8. Jason, Matilda, and the Pod Town

[00:00:00] Previously, Unwelcome to the Apocalypse

[00:00:09] Angry Adam, watch the road!

[00:00:11] Oh shit!

[00:00:12] Oh shit!

[00:00:13] Hi Felicia!

[00:00:14] Oh, fuck!

[00:00:15] Felicia's the name I gave to the firetruck.

[00:00:17] Ah, Jesus Christ was up there!

[00:00:19] We're looking for a way to get around Boston.

[00:00:22] Do you happen to have a boat?

[00:00:24] Welcome aboard the Sallianne.

[00:00:25] And first we need to go over a few safety operations.

[00:00:28] I'm your captain, Jolly Roger.

[00:00:30] I forgot to mention that island you see off in the distance, there used to be a cult on

[00:00:36] that island.

[00:00:38] After that cult disappeared, a crack in the pier.

[00:00:40] Oh it's getting closer!

[00:00:42] Oh, duh!

[00:00:44] I'm gonna spear it right through the brain!

[00:00:46] Ready?

[00:00:47] One, two, three!

[00:00:48] Look at that!

[00:00:49] I can see land getting closer.

[00:00:53] You guys see in the parking lot is that?

[00:00:55] Oh no way!

[00:00:57] Is that another firetruck?

[00:00:59] Oh my goodness!

[00:01:01] This is perfect!

[00:01:11] I don't actually think that ramen is the best meal.

[00:01:16] Ramen has bone broth, which Spina was very good for you and it has protein, it has

[00:01:21] vegetables, it's also the fun of putting in a spoon and pulling it out and being like

[00:01:26] what's gonna come up next?

[00:01:27] I'm concerned maybe that your approach to food maybe, Margaret, is maybe a little racist.

[00:01:32] I'm not entirely sure how oatmeal is racist.

[00:01:36] Look at the picture of the man on the front.

[00:01:39] He's got this cool black hat and a white beard and he just looks like he's got

[00:01:45] some authority about him.

[00:01:47] The best meal is pizza with a side of ice cream.

[00:01:51] It's all the nutrients you could really need.

[00:01:53] I'm just surprised you didn't say young crustables, angry Adam, that you were really loving

[00:01:58] those for a while there.

[00:01:59] Yeah, go through phases.

[00:02:02] You know, I had my gummy worms thing and then it kind of bit me and then the

[00:02:07] uncrustables and you know honestly it's just these food, I need something hot.

[00:02:14] You know, it's been too long.

[00:02:16] I've been eating lukewarm food.

[00:02:18] It's true, it's been a really long time since I've eaten anything delicious.

[00:02:22] Like, I actually don't know if I'm ever gonna have ramen again.

[00:02:26] Yeah, it would be pretty great if we could find a place where we could cook

[00:02:31] something again.

[00:02:32] And what?

[00:02:33] Whoa, OK.

[00:02:35] Look over there.

[00:02:36] What?

[00:02:37] I'm seeing some smoke in the distance.

[00:02:39] Either there's a fire or maybe.

[00:02:43] Oh, maybe there's a smaller fire that could be cooked on.

[00:02:46] I don't know.

[00:02:46] That seems really weirdly convenient timing.

[00:02:48] I'm going to roll down the window.

[00:02:50] OK.

[00:02:52] Kind of smells like ramen.

[00:02:55] What?

[00:02:56] Oh, I'm getting that too.

[00:02:59] I'm getting a hint of miso.

[00:03:01] I don't know, guys.

[00:03:03] This feels very convenient.

[00:03:04] But should we drive towards it?

[00:03:06] I mean, it's not like we have any other plans.

[00:03:09] That's true.

[00:03:10] We're in Rhode Island right now.

[00:03:12] And I don't think there's much here.

[00:03:14] Yeah, it's a pretty forgettable place.

[00:03:17] All right, angry Adam.

[00:03:18] Why don't you take us over there?

[00:03:19] All right, pull it in.

[00:03:21] Should we turn on the siren like we usually do

[00:03:24] as we arrive somewhere?

[00:03:25] Just to give people a warning, I think that's nice.

[00:03:27] Yeah, I think that's the polite thing to do.

[00:03:29] All right, I'm cranking it.

[00:03:31] I do miss our old fire truck though, you guys.

[00:03:33] This one is just doesn't seem quite as roomy.

[00:03:37] It's not as shiny.

[00:03:38] There's like the slight.

[00:03:40] Hey, what?

[00:03:41] What the heck?

[00:03:42] Turn your siren down!

[00:03:44] Turn that.

[00:03:45] Turn it down!

[00:03:46] But it's so pleasant.

[00:03:47] There's zombies out here.

[00:03:50] OK, down.

[00:03:51] Turn it down.

[00:03:53] Because there are zombies and Bill over there

[00:03:56] is trying to do the sound on our latest release.

[00:03:59] What?

[00:04:00] What?

[00:04:01] Your latest release?

[00:04:03] We're welcome to Pottown.

[00:04:06] Do you not know where you are?

[00:04:08] Hey, everybody.

[00:04:08] Welcome to our settlements.

[00:04:10] I'm Jason.

[00:04:11] And I'm Matilda.

[00:04:13] What?

[00:04:14] There's a settlement here?

[00:04:16] Are you kidding me?

[00:04:17] OK, guys, guys, calm down.

[00:04:19] Calm down before the apocalypse.

[00:04:23] I used to listen to this show.

[00:04:25] And that is Jason and Matilda right there.

[00:04:28] Oh my.

[00:04:29] OK, OK, I need to sit down.

[00:04:30] I need to sit down.

[00:04:31] You listen to podcasts, Margaret?

[00:04:33] Oh yeah.

[00:04:35] I had a Google Pixel.

[00:04:37] And I used to download every podcast

[00:04:39] that could get my hands on.

[00:04:40] Really?

[00:04:40] And this was one of the best.

[00:04:42] Whoa, and they're out here?

[00:04:44] This is wild.

[00:04:46] I'm sorry.

[00:04:46] I'm getting out.

[00:04:47] Hang on.

[00:04:47] Hang on.

[00:04:48] Hang on.

[00:04:49] Could you?

[00:04:50] Did you say your name was Margaret?

[00:04:52] Yes.

[00:04:54] Jason, I think it's Margaret from all

[00:04:56] those weird voicemails.

[00:04:57] Oh my god.

[00:04:59] Yes.

[00:05:00] You know, she wrote that crazy fanfic.

[00:05:03] OK, we were just about to kill you guys, honestly.

[00:05:07] I got to admit.

[00:05:08] But Margaret used to call in to the podcast.

[00:05:12] What?

[00:05:12] And remember when she critiqued my defecation habits?

[00:05:18] Yeah, I do remember that.

[00:05:20] Yeah, that's a good week.

[00:05:22] Wow.

[00:05:23] I just felt you needed to know.

[00:05:26] Oh, this is.

[00:05:26] How much was pooping discussed on this podcast?

[00:05:29] Should we kill them?

[00:05:30] I don't know.

[00:05:31] Let's take this.

[00:05:32] Listen, OK.

[00:05:33] I hear you're trying to discuss whether or not

[00:05:35] to do away with us.

[00:05:37] And I just want to make a case.

[00:05:38] So we're just going to climb down on the truck.

[00:05:40] Come on, come on guys.

[00:05:41] Look presentable.

[00:05:42] Come on.

[00:05:42] Tuck in your shirt, Adam.

[00:05:43] Tuck in.

[00:05:44] Oh, hold on.

[00:05:44] I dropped my gun.

[00:05:45] Wait a minute.

[00:05:47] Oh, all right.

[00:05:48] That's a misfire.

[00:05:48] Sorry about that.

[00:05:50] Adam?

[00:05:50] This is a big deal.

[00:05:51] We have come across individuals,

[00:05:53] but we have never come across a settlement.

[00:05:55] This is pretty major.

[00:05:58] I mean, what if they have food?

[00:05:59] What if they have a way to eat food?

[00:06:01] What if they have pizza and ice cream?

[00:06:02] What if they have single eligible men who maybe

[00:06:05] are still looking for love?

[00:06:07] I mean, this could be a really big deal.

[00:06:10] OK, hello.

[00:06:11] We are three friends.

[00:06:13] We've been traveling together since the beginning of the end.

[00:06:15] And we are hoping that maybe you could let us stay for a while.

[00:06:20] Maybe we could meet your people.

[00:06:23] So we have skills to contribute.

[00:06:26] I'm a medical leader.

[00:06:27] I'm a medical leader.

[00:06:28] Wee, wee, wee.

[00:06:30] Can I shoot my gun in the air to calm everybody down?

[00:06:34] Here's what I'll say.

[00:06:35] So Margaret, you're in.

[00:06:37] We liked your voicemails.

[00:06:38] You didn't love the fan fiction, but I like the voicemails.

[00:06:40] So Margaret's in.

[00:06:41] Um, gun guy.

[00:06:44] Hello.

[00:06:44] Yeah, yeah.

[00:06:45] It's me, angry Adam.

[00:06:46] You can come in.

[00:06:47] I'm very stable.

[00:06:48] Oh, that's nice.

[00:06:50] You can come in.

[00:06:50] As for this lady, we do have three questions

[00:06:54] that we ask people before they get into a pod town.

[00:06:57] OK, my name is Elizabeth.

[00:07:00] I'm not just a lady.

[00:07:01] I am Elizabeth.

[00:07:02] Nice to meet you, Elizabeth.

[00:07:03] I'm going to let Jason ask you the three questions.

[00:07:05] OK.

[00:07:05] We ask everyone.

[00:07:07] I'll ask the first one.

[00:07:08] Do you listen to podcasts?

[00:07:10] You know, I worked very long hours, very hard long hours

[00:07:13] in long shifts in the hospital where I was a pediatric nurse.

[00:07:18] So I didn't often have time for podcasts.

[00:07:20] But I was meant to.

[00:07:22] I had the app on my phone.

[00:07:23] And I did sometimes listen to.

[00:07:26] I had one that I liked about finance.

[00:07:28] I listened to one that was about life as a single lady

[00:07:33] and in a feminist approach to singleness.

[00:07:39] I liked makeup tutorials.

[00:07:41] My favorite podcast was actually about a group of survivors

[00:07:45] in the post-apocalypse having wacky adventures.

[00:07:49] Adam, you're really funny.

[00:07:51] What are your other questions?

[00:07:53] How many podcasts?

[00:07:58] And why?

[00:07:59] Well, I thought I kind of answered that.

[00:08:02] OK, I listened to like five.

[00:08:05] Matilda, can we talk over on the side here?

[00:08:08] They're doing sidebars too.

[00:08:09] We love doing that.

[00:08:10] OK.

[00:08:10] Yeah.

[00:08:11] OK, Jason, what is it?

[00:08:12] So what do you think about these people?

[00:08:14] I think Angry Adam seems.

[00:08:17] I like him.

[00:08:18] He doesn't seem that angry.

[00:08:20] I very much approve of Angry Adam.

[00:08:22] He can.

[00:08:24] You know, there's a spare bunk in my room.

[00:08:26] So we could always bunk there.

[00:08:27] You really like him.

[00:08:28] I mean, yeah.

[00:08:29] All right.

[00:08:30] I don't know, whatever.

[00:08:31] Less judgment.

[00:08:31] Thank you.

[00:08:32] You're a great judge.

[00:08:33] How many bunks are in there again?

[00:08:35] I forgot.

[00:08:36] Oh, like one.

[00:08:38] Maybe anyway.

[00:08:39] And Margaret.

[00:08:40] How's your.

[00:08:41] Margaret, I feel OK.

[00:08:44] I feel that Margaret is actually

[00:08:47] she seems harmless enough on the surface.

[00:08:49] But I sense that there's some there's

[00:08:52] a lot of unpredictability there.

[00:08:53] I mean, the fan fiction she wrote, it was dark.

[00:08:57] Yeah.

[00:08:57] There's some dark shit in there.

[00:08:58] I want to know more about her for sure.

[00:09:02] But I'm also kind of wary.

[00:09:04] I'm strangely compelled.

[00:09:06] I think we need to bring her in.

[00:09:07] Definitely for a listener chit chat, if nothing else.

[00:09:10] Because that will get our numbers up, I think,

[00:09:12] for next week.

[00:09:12] That's right.

[00:09:13] Yeah.

[00:09:13] It's very important.

[00:09:15] And then Elizabeth seems very, very needy.

[00:09:19] But I like flawed people.

[00:09:21] You know, we need all kinds of people

[00:09:23] to make this community work.

[00:09:25] And if everyone's too perfect and everyone else will be jealous.

[00:09:29] And I think that she's thriving more in the zombie apocalypse,

[00:09:34] I can tell, than before because of this whole situation.

[00:09:38] What do you think?

[00:09:39] I mean, another thing I think is that if we cross her,

[00:09:42] I feel like she's the most dangerous one.

[00:09:45] In fact, she seems to want our approval.

[00:09:47] But I feel like if we don't get her approval, we're fucked.

[00:09:50] Like I take your point.

[00:09:51] But like are people actually going

[00:09:52] to want to listen to a show with more than one woman talking?

[00:09:55] Because I think no.

[00:09:56] I think we'll lose this thing.

[00:09:57] I mean, if they don't laugh a lot, it should be fine.

[00:10:00] I haven't really heard her laughing all that much.

[00:10:03] So that's true.

[00:10:04] They don't like it.

[00:10:04] That's a good sign.

[00:10:06] Jason, this one's on you.

[00:10:07] I'll vouch for Margaret, Adam.

[00:10:10] No problem with that.

[00:10:11] We were just having our ramen get together.

[00:10:15] And I think, I don't know if they like ramen,

[00:10:17] but maybe they might.

[00:10:18] And we could invite them in and just see how it goes.

[00:10:20] But we'll definitely have our snipers with their guns

[00:10:24] trained on them just in case anyone gets out alive.

[00:10:26] This is a really long conversation.

[00:10:28] They're just having in front of us.

[00:10:30] I know.

[00:10:31] Right, let's get them in.

[00:10:32] Get them in for the ramen.

[00:10:33] All right, let them in.

[00:10:35] Come on in, guys.

[00:10:36] Come on in, guys.

[00:10:37] Before we go in, we're going to also have a little sidebar

[00:10:42] real quick.

[00:10:42] Yeah, like, oh, we're just going to talk.

[00:10:44] You know, we're going to be responsible.

[00:10:46] We're going to have a sidebar.

[00:10:47] Yeah, I mean, you got your sidebar.

[00:10:49] It's only fair.

[00:10:50] That's fair.

[00:10:50] That's fair.

[00:10:51] OK, Elizabeth.

[00:10:53] Yeah?

[00:10:54] The questions they asked you.

[00:10:56] Yeah?

[00:10:57] I've listened to their podcast and these two

[00:10:59] are huge fans of a television show called Fear the Walking

[00:11:06] Bread, I think.

[00:11:07] Walking Bread?

[00:11:08] I would be scared of Walking Bread too.

[00:11:09] Walking Bread is messed up.

[00:11:11] They love the show.

[00:11:13] And they're constantly going on about it.

[00:11:15] So I think you should drop hints

[00:11:17] that you have watched that show.

[00:11:20] So yeah, talk about, like, facotchas and sourdose

[00:11:27] that perhaps are ambulating around.

[00:11:29] I think that'll really win them over.

[00:11:33] I really don't want to mess this up for us,

[00:11:34] but I do feel like they were giving me a lot of looks

[00:11:37] and thinking a lot about me, like, not in a good way.

[00:11:39] It's OK.

[00:11:39] I'm used to it.

[00:11:40] I've used to people wondering if I belong.

[00:11:42] Well, Elizabeth, it's because you give off

[00:11:45] an air of confidence and you're very intimidating

[00:11:50] upon first meeting.

[00:11:51] I think they are just jealous of you, my dear.

[00:11:55] Oh, thank you, Mom.

[00:11:56] I mean, Margaret.

[00:11:57] That is very true.

[00:11:58] Anyone who dislikes you is probably just jealous.

[00:12:02] OK.

[00:12:02] Thanks, Adam.

[00:12:03] You should never question your own behavior.

[00:12:04] OK.

[00:12:05] Thank you.

[00:12:05] OK.

[00:12:06] Well, there are a lot of zombies coming.

[00:12:09] I think the siren may have been a bad idea.

[00:12:11] So let's take their.

[00:12:14] So yes, we would love to come in.

[00:12:17] Awesome.

[00:12:17] Well, stay tuned.

[00:12:18] There is more to come beyond the fence.

[00:12:21] Oh, I would hope so.

[00:12:22] Great.

[00:12:25] Welcome to the Apocalypse.

[00:12:26] We'll be back after these messages.

[00:12:33] And we're back with Welcome to the Apocalypse.

[00:12:37] Come on in.

[00:12:38] Now, as we show you around our area here,

[00:12:42] I just want to tell you a little bit about ourselves

[00:12:45] and our community.

[00:12:47] You know, we used to podcast about this show

[00:12:49] Fear the Walking Bread.

[00:12:51] Oh, it's a great show.

[00:12:52] I love it.

[00:12:53] Really?

[00:12:53] Oh my god, Elizabeth, you watched it.

[00:12:55] That's so cool.

[00:12:56] What was your favorite season?

[00:12:58] Oh, well, I really enjoyed season one.

[00:13:00] Really?

[00:13:01] Yeah, I know it's an unusual choice.

[00:13:04] But I, you know, it came in strong.

[00:13:08] Oh, who's your favorite character?

[00:13:10] I feel like the Focaccia was a really excellent.

[00:13:14] Elizabeth, Elizabeth, careful with the Focaccia.

[00:13:17] Talk about bagels.

[00:13:19] OK.

[00:13:20] You know, Focaccia was interesting,

[00:13:21] but I really enjoyed the bagels.

[00:13:23] Oh yeah, I mean the bagels.

[00:13:24] Yeah.

[00:13:25] With their little feet and I love them a lot.

[00:13:29] And how they came to life and killed all of humanity.

[00:13:32] It was just great.

[00:13:34] So we really felt like we talked about the apocalypse

[00:13:38] so much that in all of our listeners

[00:13:40] think that we would be well prepared for it.

[00:13:42] But really, I mean not at all.

[00:13:44] No, really.

[00:13:45] Terrific.

[00:13:46] Yeah, I mean we were the worst.

[00:13:48] But luckily all these zombies are very slow and dumb.

[00:13:51] And I honestly don't understand why anyone died in this.

[00:13:55] I mean they're so easy to get away from.

[00:13:56] Like you look at you guys, you seem

[00:13:58] to have come through fine.

[00:13:59] Yes?

[00:14:00] How have you fared?

[00:14:01] I noticed you're missing a hand.

[00:14:03] But I mean that probably happened before the apocalypse.

[00:14:05] Right?

[00:14:06] That's what I assumed.

[00:14:06] Well, yes it did.

[00:14:10] We have lost some people.

[00:14:14] We shouldn't really bring it up around Elizabeth.

[00:14:17] She's still a little heartbroken, but we lost our friend

[00:14:20] Squeaks just a few days ago.

[00:14:22] It's a very important character in our journey.

[00:14:26] Yes, he was peeing and he couldn't reach for his weapon

[00:14:31] because he was holding his wiener.

[00:14:33] He was peeing.

[00:14:34] It was really it was pretty gross.

[00:14:36] It was a tough way to go out, but it happens.

[00:14:39] I mean, surprisingly enough, we've lost a few

[00:14:42] and that's been the most common way that they've gone.

[00:14:44] It really has.

[00:14:45] I'm assuming it's all happened outside the walls, though.

[00:14:49] It looks pretty well protected in here.

[00:14:51] We have a very strong no toilet inside the walls.

[00:14:54] So if you got to go, you got to go.

[00:14:57] So you got to go to the outhouse.

[00:14:59] And it can be rough.

[00:15:01] It's been very, very calm around here.

[00:15:03] We've had almost no problem because as I said,

[00:15:05] these zombies are so slow and dumb.

[00:15:08] But there was a group of rough men that came.

[00:15:12] They barged in, they demanded all of our playboys.

[00:15:15] They just took all the Playboy magazines and then they seemed to.

[00:15:19] That was what they were there for, really.

[00:15:21] But then they got the idea that since they were already taking things,

[00:15:23] maybe they would take other things.

[00:15:25] Oh, no.

[00:15:25] I just wanted to let you guys know about that

[00:15:28] because our snipers were in the outhouse

[00:15:31] and so they didn't have a chance to kill them and they got away.

[00:15:35] Huh. That sounds kind of familiar.

[00:15:37] Yeah, we have a Playboy.

[00:15:39] It's a we do.

[00:15:40] Yeah, that was a yes.

[00:15:41] Remember all the articles were circled

[00:15:43] because he was definitely reading them for the articles.

[00:15:45] Might have been some penthouses in there

[00:15:47] in case that's OK. OK.

[00:15:49] I don't know. But like, all I can tell you is

[00:15:51] we've got a hell of a lot less ramen than we used to.

[00:15:54] And only one podcasting mic.

[00:15:57] So that's all for it.

[00:15:58] And go to sit real close together now.

[00:16:00] Because someone someone likes to hug the mic.

[00:16:03] Didn't they? Yeah.

[00:16:05] It's you. Yeah, no, it's not me.

[00:16:08] So how can I just ask?

[00:16:10] Like so you have it looks like you have some some houses here

[00:16:13] and you've got a road through the middle

[00:16:15] and then there's this fence here.

[00:16:17] How many people live here?

[00:16:20] Well, we had around, I would say, 60

[00:16:24] and now we're down to five.

[00:16:25] But you know, it's about the outhouses mostly.

[00:16:29] I got to admit we need more people in the community,

[00:16:32] but we can't just let anyone in.

[00:16:34] We have sort of a system here. OK.

[00:16:36] All you need to do is just put on some little sort of

[00:16:40] a play or drama or something like that could just be a short thing.

[00:16:44] Because Lucy and I need some material to talk about

[00:16:48] and on our podcast.

[00:16:49] We thought podcasting wouldn't come in handy, but the worst

[00:16:52] bit is we were podcasting on the Playboys.

[00:16:55] So it was nothing to podcast on.

[00:16:57] So can I just ask?

[00:16:58] Like when you didn't even leave half, didn't even leave half.

[00:17:01] So you record the podcast and then do you like how do you are there still?

[00:17:07] Like how do you share them with the world?

[00:17:10] They're mostly live these days.

[00:17:12] I mean, we have we figure around five people who are listening,

[00:17:17] you know, the ones that are still just to clarify,

[00:17:21] is it five, including the two of you?

[00:17:23] Yes, it is Margaret. Is that an issue? Yes.

[00:17:26] Yeah. So there's there's three listeners.

[00:17:29] No, there's what I listen.

[00:17:31] We listen to each other and sometimes the zombies can hear.

[00:17:36] Yes. And I listened to her and she listened to me.

[00:17:38] So that's kind of like four people.

[00:17:40] OK, yes, I see the logic in that.

[00:17:44] Looks like someone's walking up.

[00:17:45] Hello, my name is Stahib.

[00:17:47] I'm going to go out and take a piss.

[00:17:48] Can you watch me?

[00:17:50] Oh, Steve. Steve.

[00:17:53] No, no, no. Oh, wow.

[00:17:55] That was fat. They got him immediately.

[00:17:57] Yeah. Oh, my God. OK.

[00:17:59] Oh, we're down to four listeners, but that's still pretty good.

[00:18:04] Do any of you know how to build a toilet or just open trust?

[00:18:10] Like like in the wall kind of toilet?

[00:18:13] Just like I'm just going to say,

[00:18:15] Jason was really keen on the go out to go.

[00:18:18] And I was more like maybe, you know, stay in to go.

[00:18:22] But then he was like, oh, you know how to build a toilet?

[00:18:26] To build a toilet.

[00:18:27] That's why we have go out to go written on the walls everywhere.

[00:18:30] It's kind of our mantra.

[00:18:32] I was wondering that, yes, go out to go.

[00:18:35] It's vague, but it's medicine.

[00:18:37] Yeah, you really wrote it in a very jagged font.

[00:18:40] That's a set. Why is it?

[00:18:43] Is that blood? Did you write it in blood?

[00:18:45] No, that's actually feces, you know,

[00:18:47] just as a reminder of what can happen when you only eat ramen.

[00:18:51] If you don't follow the rules.

[00:18:53] Don't have a bathroom.

[00:18:55] Just just before we try any of this ramen.

[00:18:58] Where do you keep your hand washing station?

[00:19:01] Is that inside?

[00:19:02] We have plans drawn up for that.

[00:19:04] And it's it's going to be here as soon as someone comes in.

[00:19:09] Do you know how to make a hand washing station, by the way,

[00:19:11] just apropos of nothing?

[00:19:14] I did do some work for Habitat for Humanity when I was younger.

[00:19:18] So I could probably excellent.

[00:19:21] I mean, if you already have a vanity somewhere,

[00:19:23] I could probably plummet.

[00:19:25] I got a little flamethrower that can sterilize stuff.

[00:19:28] Well, I can't wait to see what kind of play you guys are going to put on

[00:19:32] to see if you can be a part of our community then.

[00:19:34] Yeah, because there's still that to get through.

[00:19:36] We have to do the test.

[00:19:38] Um, OK, Elizabeth,

[00:19:42] are you ready to do a play and angry Adam?

[00:19:47] Do you have any acting chops?

[00:19:49] He's a I mean, I can do a play.

[00:19:53] I dabbled in a little theater

[00:19:57] while I was thought maybe it'd be a good place to meet.

[00:20:00] Meet some guys.

[00:20:02] They did meet some guys, but they were mostly gay.

[00:20:04] Yes. Yeah.

[00:20:05] But anyway, I did pick up a few things.

[00:20:08] Did we establish?

[00:20:11] What happens if they don't like the play?

[00:20:15] No. Do we do we do we die?

[00:20:17] It just means that the podcast is longer.

[00:20:20] It's more of a rant.

[00:20:21] It'll be more like a stage

[00:20:26] first to perform or yeah, yeah, right over here.

[00:20:30] Yeah, yeah, that's the one thing we do have.

[00:20:32] These are these are nice.

[00:20:35] Just ignore just don't worry about the smell.

[00:20:38] Don't worry about that.

[00:20:39] Don't worry about that and we'll get the other.

[00:20:40] Where are the other three?

[00:20:42] No, two. Oh, fuck, Stevie.

[00:20:44] The other two were Bill and Ben.

[00:20:46] Where have they gone? Bill, Ben.

[00:20:49] I never mind.

[00:20:50] They suck anyway.

[00:20:51] Why? I'm right here.

[00:20:53] Why? Why are you always insulting me?

[00:20:57] Bill, can you just sit and watch this play, please?

[00:20:59] Oh, another one of these plays.

[00:21:02] Here we go. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:21:03] Hey, Bill, are they making us launch another play?

[00:21:06] Ben, shut up.

[00:21:08] Oh, no one respects me around here.

[00:21:10] Ben, just shut up and sit in the shit seat.

[00:21:12] I have to pee. Can I go out and pee first?

[00:21:15] OK.

[00:21:19] Oh, I think he got.

[00:21:23] Oh, crap, Ben got.

[00:21:27] All right. OK.

[00:21:29] Um, if I could see my my my friends.

[00:21:33] Yes, Elizabeth. Yeah.

[00:21:34] OK, do you have a plan?

[00:21:36] Well, I'm not sure we should stay here.

[00:21:40] They keep how come because.

[00:21:43] Because people keep dying who live here.

[00:21:45] And also I think if we stay here,

[00:21:47] we just have to take it over.

[00:21:50] Well, because they don't seem to know what they're doing.

[00:21:52] But we have to get through this next hurdle.

[00:21:55] So yes. Yes. OK.

[00:21:56] So here's what we're going to do.

[00:21:57] Do you are you familiar with the story

[00:22:01] of the three little pigs?

[00:22:03] Yes. Yes. I think I knew that one.

[00:22:05] OK, we're going to do the three little pigs

[00:22:07] and we'll just be two little pigs.

[00:22:10] I want to be the big bad wolf.

[00:22:11] Yeah, you're the wolf who can bet.

[00:22:13] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:22:14] Yeah, you can pretend to break down doors.

[00:22:16] So we're just going to be two little pigs.

[00:22:17] All right, so we're going to say I am a big bad wolf.

[00:22:20] OK, are you ready?

[00:22:21] OK, let's get on the stage.

[00:22:23] I was born ready.

[00:22:24] Just follow my lead, Margaret.

[00:22:26] OK, OK.

[00:22:28] Hello, friends and family and family.

[00:22:33] And we will be performing for you

[00:22:35] our our debut of the two little pigs

[00:22:40] and the big bad wolf.

[00:22:43] OK, here we go.

[00:22:45] It was a hot summer's day in Georgia.

[00:22:50] And I just talked to my mom

[00:22:53] and she had said that I was going to have to marry

[00:22:57] that sour boy down the street.

[00:22:59] And I wiped the sweat from my brow

[00:23:03] and said, I have to talk to my other pig friend.

[00:23:12] Hi. What's what's going on?

[00:23:15] My mom says I have to marry.

[00:23:19] Oh, good God, I'm not good at this.

[00:23:22] It's OK, you're doing great.

[00:23:23] You're doing great, Margaret.

[00:23:24] OK, well, I don't think you should get married.

[00:23:26] I think we should run away.

[00:23:27] Who?

[00:23:28] And so the two little pigs ran away

[00:23:31] to live in two separate houses by themselves.

[00:23:35] Yes, like a couple.

[00:23:37] Like a single lady's.

[00:23:38] They were a couple of single ladies on their own.

[00:23:42] Yes.

[00:23:42] And then one day.

[00:23:43] So I'm a single lady pig living in my house.

[00:23:47] And then also a single lady pig in a house.

[00:23:51] And then all of a sudden I'm just

[00:23:53] minding my own business.

[00:23:55] I was watching.

[00:23:57] Oh, no. Who's that at my door?

[00:24:00] I'm a big bad wolf.

[00:24:02] You know, I don't want I don't want you in my house.

[00:24:07] I'm living the single lady life.

[00:24:09] I don't want to be tied down.

[00:24:12] Well, that's too bad, because I'm going to blow up your house

[00:24:17] with a flamethrower that I this wolf has.

[00:24:21] Oh, no. OK, I'm going to.

[00:24:23] So this little piggy, she climbed out a window

[00:24:26] while the wolf was preparing to race in.

[00:24:30] Oh, shit, I said the curtain on fire.

[00:24:32] Oh, oh, OK.

[00:24:34] Oh, guys, come on that stage.

[00:24:36] Guys, that's the one thing we have.

[00:24:39] We did it. We got the fire.

[00:24:41] We got the fire.

[00:24:42] OK, OK, OK, this is intense.

[00:24:44] I love it. I love it.

[00:24:45] This is very tense.

[00:24:47] Now I have stepped out with a

[00:24:52] hey, big bad wolf.

[00:24:53] It was a hello to my little friend and

[00:24:57] my friend.

[00:24:58] Oh, shit.

[00:24:59] Oh, yeah.

[00:25:01] Are you shooting at me?

[00:25:03] That gun's loaded.

[00:25:04] These were blanks.

[00:25:06] Oh, my God.

[00:25:06] I'm so sorry. Angry at them.

[00:25:08] Um, um, um,

[00:25:10] mental note, Matilda, take the weapons next time.

[00:25:13] Yes, I agree with that.

[00:25:15] Yeah. Yeah.

[00:25:15] Capital.

[00:25:16] So that's the end of our play.

[00:25:18] I we hope that you enjoyed that our feminists take

[00:25:21] and are and are our modern look at single lady

[00:25:26] and and the and the pay the wolf is an allegory

[00:25:30] for the patriarchy trying to take down two lady pigs.

[00:25:33] Yeah, I'm an allegory.

[00:25:35] Yeah. All right.

[00:25:36] All right.

[00:25:38] Where's the microphone?

[00:25:39] Did you did you do you have the microphone?

[00:25:41] I'm going to get it.

[00:25:42] Here's the microphone.

[00:25:43] Everybody, welcome to Fear the Walking

[00:25:45] Break cast. This is our answer reaction

[00:25:47] for the two little pigs, a reboot of sorts.

[00:25:51] Two little pigs.

[00:25:52] So Matilda, what did you think in general?

[00:25:55] I mean, I was captivated,

[00:25:56] but I'm honestly was a bit confused by parts of it.

[00:26:00] So were we feel like the message was quite heavy.

[00:26:04] Tell you what though, that wolf.

[00:26:06] Oh, no wonder the stage went on fire.

[00:26:09] All right. Yeah, I mean, other things run fire.

[00:26:12] I could feel angry, angry, Adam.

[00:26:14] Yeah, take your take your shirt off.

[00:26:17] I think it might help us out.

[00:26:18] Are you trying to objectify me for everybody's benefit?

[00:26:23] Because I'm OK with that.

[00:26:24] I tried to make a feminist plan.

[00:26:26] It doesn't mean that we get to objectify Adam.

[00:26:28] No, I already took my shirt off.

[00:26:31] This is the wrong way to flex and look at my cool tattoos.

[00:26:34] What about you, Jason?

[00:26:35] What do you think, Jason?

[00:26:36] I mean, I got to admit that wolf is hot.

[00:26:38] And I'm kind of glad that Margaret is such a bad shot

[00:26:42] because even though this character is a bad guy,

[00:26:46] I'm I just like he's so charming.

[00:26:48] He's charming. I just love him like right.

[00:26:50] I mean, I know he goes around eating people all the time,

[00:26:53] but I mean, look at those eyes.

[00:26:56] He's great with kids as well.

[00:26:58] Oh my God, he's great with kids.

[00:27:00] That's the only thing.

[00:27:01] I just think like it was just kind of lightened up,

[00:27:04] you know, I mean, like just having fun.

[00:27:07] If I'm reading you right here, Matilda,

[00:27:09] I think we're going to try to bring in angry Adam

[00:27:12] and just let the other two go. Is that correct?

[00:27:15] I wouldn't complain about that outcome,

[00:27:17] but I do feel out of sisterhood.

[00:27:19] And you know, Margaret is a fan

[00:27:22] that we probably should allow all three to stay.

[00:27:25] Also, we just lost Ben to another toilet based disaster

[00:27:29] and it's down to just us and Bill.

[00:27:32] Right. And the sniper, don't forget.

[00:27:33] It's like, Steve, what's up, Steve?

[00:27:38] So did did we pass your test?

[00:27:42] I mean, that was one of the best things

[00:27:45] I've seen in my whole career podcast.

[00:27:48] Honestly, I got to say.

[00:27:49] Thank you. I really agree.

[00:27:51] Thank you. You're the walking bread level.

[00:27:53] Wow. Wow. What's next?

[00:27:55] Did you do we get a bunker house or some ramen or some ramen?

[00:28:01] Yes, some ramen.

[00:28:03] Well, we'll do the ramen because it's been sitting congealing

[00:28:06] in the sun for a little bit now.

[00:28:07] So I'm just going to dish that up for you.

[00:28:09] So here you go.

[00:28:10] Adam only smells slightly fetid.

[00:28:13] Nice big bowl of ramen for you at Elizabeth.

[00:28:16] Yes, some ramen also.

[00:28:18] Thank you, Margaret.

[00:28:20] Some ramen and Jason.

[00:28:21] Here's your ramen.

[00:28:27] So, so just so you just I just have an interest act.

[00:28:30] I just want to know more about you.

[00:28:32] How long have you been podcasting together?

[00:28:34] Is this the only show you've done or do you have other shows?

[00:28:37] I mean, Margaret knows all about it.

[00:28:39] Yeah, Margaret was on our Patreon for years.

[00:28:42] That's true.

[00:28:42] I actually was an admin for a little bit

[00:28:45] until you guys said that I was being a little aggressive.

[00:28:50] To be honest, you really did inspire this whole go out to go thing.

[00:28:54] I just want to give you credit.

[00:28:56] We saw you just now and it was it was

[00:28:59] just kind of felt like fate that you would show up.

[00:29:01] Yeah.

[00:29:02] I just, you know, having listened to you guys in the car

[00:29:07] while doing dishes occasionally on the toilet.

[00:29:12] I remember those voice calls, Margaret.

[00:29:14] You did not blush, did you?

[00:29:17] Well, I didn't want the noise.

[00:29:19] So I just, you know, you let it go.

[00:29:22] But yes, the two of you have just been an inspiration.

[00:29:25] You've been podcasting for nearly 12 years.

[00:29:28] And it seems like the two of you are just

[00:29:30] like the best of friends.

[00:29:32] It's amazing.

[00:29:35] It does seem like that.

[00:29:36] Don't thank you.

[00:29:37] Yeah, it seems like that.

[00:29:40] I'm actually just going to go.

[00:29:42] I've got to go and check if we have that vanity.

[00:29:45] So I'm going to leave for a little bit.

[00:29:46] You'll be fine with Jason.

[00:29:47] I'll be I'll be two seconds.

[00:29:49] Just going to get that vanity.

[00:29:50] Adam, if you want to come, you can.

[00:29:51] You don't have to.

[00:29:52] But if you want to, you can.

[00:29:53] But you don't have to.

[00:29:54] I'm just going to go that way.

[00:29:55] Adam, perhaps you should go.

[00:29:57] The vanity could be quite heavy and you're strong.

[00:30:00] I am.

[00:30:01] I am strong.

[00:30:02] And I like being told that I'm strong.

[00:30:03] I'm going.

[00:30:04] Adam, watch your back.

[00:30:05] OK, I don't entirely trust her with you and your body.

[00:30:08] I'm fine.

[00:30:09] This happens every time, by the way.

[00:30:11] Every time?

[00:30:13] What happens every?

[00:30:14] No, no, it's a good thing.

[00:30:16] It's a good thing.

[00:30:16] Don't worry.

[00:30:16] OK.

[00:30:18] So now that it's just us and you,

[00:30:22] I have to ask, it does seem like there's

[00:30:25] a little bit of tension between the two of you.

[00:30:28] Is the apocalypse sort of frazzled your nerves or something?

[00:30:33] I mean, it's it's been a little bit rough

[00:30:37] and my family is out in California,

[00:30:40] you know, weathering this thing out

[00:30:42] and they're in some safe zone or something.

[00:30:44] But they I told them, yeah, it's it's hard

[00:30:49] to stay in a professional relationship

[00:30:52] with someone for so long

[00:30:54] because it gets really tense, but it's for my career.

[00:30:56] So I've stayed in the settlement.

[00:31:01] I have to say, I.

[00:31:03] I don't think you need to.

[00:31:05] I mean, I honor your commitment to your job and your career.

[00:31:10] But like, nobody's listening anymore.

[00:31:13] I mean, you got to be thankful

[00:31:16] that anyone would sit and listen to you talk

[00:31:20] for a half an hour, an hour for every single person.

[00:31:25] And so I actually don't don't don't appreciate that sentiment

[00:31:29] because I value every single listener, even even you guys.

[00:31:33] To be fair, in this situation, you sort of forced us.

[00:31:40] I mean, yeah, you guys are not looking on the bright side here.

[00:31:45] You need to like like improve every cloud has a silver lining

[00:31:49] and all that kind of a thing and yada, yada, yada.

[00:31:52] Of course, you know, that's also a good one.

[00:31:54] I think I need to have a sidebar with my my friend, Margaret.

[00:31:58] Yes, Elizabeth. Yeah.

[00:31:59] You know that old saying, you should never meet heroes.

[00:32:05] Yes, that old saying, you should never meet your heroes.

[00:32:08] Yeah. I'm starting to understand why these people seem insane.

[00:32:15] I know. And I have one hand and you cut it off.

[00:32:19] And I'm like, what is up with these guys?

[00:32:22] They seem deluded.

[00:32:23] I don't think we can stay here for for one thing.

[00:32:26] I think we're going to lose Adam to that Matilda.

[00:32:29] Hi, everyone. Oh, my God.

[00:32:31] So funny story, funny, OK, two funny stories.

[00:32:34] One's not funny.

[00:32:34] One's quite funny.

[00:32:35] One is funny.

[00:32:37] Is that Adam lost his trousers?

[00:32:39] Oh, my God. Don't know where they went.

[00:32:41] Second, not so funny story.

[00:32:43] I think we've lost half the vanity.

[00:32:46] Oh, like somebody took half the vanity.

[00:32:49] I think so. Yeah.

[00:32:51] Yeah, I just gone and we we we only have one tap,

[00:32:56] half a cupboard and half a door.

[00:32:59] So that dream of an indoor bathroom.

[00:33:03] Just going to stay a dream of it.

[00:33:04] It's a half bath really.

[00:33:06] Is it half bath?

[00:33:07] They were efficient with their half of everything.

[00:33:11] Interesting.

[00:33:12] Um.

[00:33:15] Watch out for those guys before, you know,

[00:33:18] I feel like there's a bit of a negotiation coming on here.

[00:33:21] If maybe you guys aren't so sure if you want to be here,

[00:33:24] I want to continue this.

[00:33:25] I realize that I need to go to the bathroom.

[00:33:28] So let me just take care of that.

[00:33:30] We'll be back.

[00:33:31] I'll come back and then we'll suss it out.

[00:33:32] OK, should we make sure the sniper is up there?

[00:33:36] OK, I'm just going to go.

[00:33:37] I really got to go.

[00:33:38] Sorry, OK, OK.

[00:33:40] Oh, wow.

[00:33:41] He closed the door in this time.

[00:33:43] Close it.

[00:33:45] Oh, no. Oh, no.

[00:33:47] God save Jason.

[00:33:48] Oh, no.

[00:33:50] Oh, man. I don't know how to edit.

[00:33:52] I don't know how to edit.

[00:33:54] He never shot me.

[00:33:54] Oh my god, I have to go out and save him.

[00:33:57] Oh, no. OK, you guys,

[00:33:58] you can look after this place.

[00:33:59] I'm going to go now. OK.

[00:34:00] I'm going to go now.

[00:34:02] Bye.

[00:34:03] Don't go out.

[00:34:04] I don't love you.

[00:34:05] I'll miss you.

[00:34:06] Oh, God.

[00:34:07] Oh, God.

[00:34:09] Oh, my God.

[00:34:09] They're tearing her apart and they're tearing him apart.

[00:34:12] And oh, my goodness.

[00:34:14] They both took their trousers down

[00:34:16] before they even got out there.

[00:34:18] This is disgusting and harrowing.

[00:34:21] And angry Adam, help me close the door.

[00:34:25] Oh, oh, holy shit.

[00:34:27] Oh, my goodness.

[00:34:28] Angry Adam, she tied you up.

[00:34:30] Let me get you untied.

[00:34:32] I'm sorry.

[00:34:33] She tied your trousers right around your head.

[00:34:35] Oh, what was she planning?

[00:34:38] I don't know.

[00:34:39] All of a sudden, she hit me with a podcast

[00:34:42] like when I wasn't looking.

[00:34:43] What?

[00:34:44] So wait a second.

[00:34:46] Knock me over the head.

[00:34:47] I was out for a couple of seconds

[00:34:48] and it was quick enough.

[00:34:50] So they had two podcast mics the whole time.

[00:34:54] Angry Adam, I'm beginning to think

[00:34:56] they might not have been telling us the whole truth.

[00:34:58] Yeah, I think that was their biggest betrayal.

[00:35:01] All right, let's get this door closed before they.

[00:35:04] Oh.

[00:35:05] Oh, wow, they turned already.

[00:35:07] Look at Jason shambling over here

[00:35:10] and Matilda's getting up too.

[00:35:12] Well, wait a minute.

[00:35:13] It looks like they're sitting back down

[00:35:17] at their microphones.

[00:35:19] Oh, welcome to the podcast.

[00:35:24] I like Moans the best.

[00:35:30] Angry Adam, please.

[00:35:32] I think we need to put them out of their misery.

[00:35:35] But isn't this what they always wanted to podcast forever?

[00:35:40] What did you think in general?

[00:35:43] I liked it well enough.

[00:35:46] You know what?

[00:35:47] Let's let them stay here.

[00:35:50] Yeah, I think this is what they want to be.

[00:35:53] Being as zombie is cool.

[00:35:55] Let's just back away slowly.

[00:35:58] I feel like we haven't been being so fair

[00:36:01] to the poor walkers.

[00:36:02] Stay tuned.

[00:36:04] There's more to come.

[00:36:06] I didn't I didn't really understand the perspective.

[00:36:09] I feel bad.

[00:36:10] I just want praise.

[00:36:13] I feel like this is the natural progression of a podcaster

[00:36:16] to suddenly fully flip sides and become a zombie nut.

[00:36:21] OK, well, you too.

[00:36:23] Sorry, it didn't didn't work out.

[00:36:25] Don't get bad.

[00:36:28] Yeah, good luck with the, you know, being dead and stuff.

[00:36:32] All right, bye.

[00:36:34] Grab the ramen.

[00:36:35] Yeah, OK, quick, quick.

[00:36:37] Let's hurry.

[00:36:38] Oh, all right.

[00:36:40] OK, back into the fire truck.

[00:36:42] Yeah, all right.

[00:36:45] Whose idea was it to pull over here?

[00:36:48] I don't know.

[00:36:48] Somebody saw them smoke.

[00:36:50] I think it was you, Margaret.

[00:36:52] Yes, I think it was angry at him, Elizabeth.

[00:36:54] Well, it certainly wasn't me.

[00:36:55] You know, I may have been

[00:36:58] attacked with a podcast microphone, knocked out and tied up

[00:37:02] and many of the fairest things were intended towards me,

[00:37:06] but they did say I was hot.

[00:37:07] So maybe they weren't too bad.

[00:37:10] Well, like silver lightings at all.

[00:37:13] Well, OK, so I guess one thing that came out of that visit

[00:37:18] one, we learned that a lot of people there appreciate

[00:37:22] our very own angry Adam, which of course we all knew.

[00:37:26] We also confirmed that a lot of people find me a little too much,

[00:37:29] which I guess we also already knew.

[00:37:32] But we did learn about some group that's going around taking

[00:37:37] half of everybody's stuff and all labels left the Kenpen houses.

[00:37:45] Did anybody else just hear that?

[00:37:47] Oh, I'm sorry.

[00:37:48] I actually I have my podcast player on.

[00:37:52] It's this is my zoom.

[00:37:54] I left it playing and click that off.

[00:37:57] There we go.

[00:37:58] Yeah, we're going to have to keep an eye out for these ruffians.

[00:38:01] Yeah, I'm not worried about them.

[00:38:03] I can take whatever comes our way.

[00:38:05] Well, OK. OK.

[00:38:07] Unless I get hit with a podcast mic.

[00:38:09] That may be my weakness. Yeah.

[00:38:11] Fair. All right.

[00:38:13] Should we hit the road again?

[00:38:14] I think so. So where are we headed this time?

[00:38:17] Well, I guess Rhode Island is only like five minutes long.

[00:38:21] So we're probably hitting Connecticut and getting close to New York soon.

[00:38:25] No, actually, guys, we've been driving for three minutes.

[00:38:28] Now we've already left Rhode Island.

[00:38:30] Oh, OK. Well, good riddance.

[00:38:33] Do you think we can maybe have some adventures along the way?

[00:38:35] I know there's like a like an old beam part coming up

[00:38:38] somewhere along the highway that I used to go to as a kid.

[00:38:41] I agree. Let's let's go somewhere fun after today.

[00:38:44] Yeah, I just I just need some fun, you know.

[00:38:47] Yeah, me too. Time for a vacation.

[00:38:50] I'm going to put this podcast on because it's going to take a little while.

[00:38:53] It's actually one of my favorites.

[00:38:55] It's welcome to Pott Town.

[00:38:58] I think you guys are going to like it.

[00:38:59] So as we drive away, let's listen to this.

[00:39:02] Hey, everybody, and welcome to Pott Town.

[00:39:04] I'm your host Matilda and I'm Jason.

[00:39:06] And this week we're potting about the pods.

[00:39:09] Way you got to be thankful that anyone would sit and listen to you.

[00:39:15] Talking for a half an hour or an hour.

[00:39:19] For every single person.

[00:39:22] I'm Jenny and I'm Randy and I'm Rob.

[00:39:25] And thank you for listening to Welcome to the Apocalypse.

[00:39:28] If you want to send us a message or get in touch with us,

[00:39:30] you can find all our contact information at podcast.com.

[00:39:34] And while you're there, be sure to check out our other shows

[00:39:37] like Lucy and Jason's hit show The Cast of Us.

[00:39:41] They're currently covering The Ones Who Live,

[00:39:44] which is the Rick and Michonne Love Story.

[00:39:48] And their coverage is making the show so much more enjoyable to watch.

[00:39:53] So if you're a walking dead fan, you need to be listening to The Cast of Us.

[00:39:57] A special thank you to our guests, Jason and Lucy,

[00:40:01] for entering the apocalypse with us.

[00:40:03] And that's our show.

[00:40:05] Until next time, welcome to the apocalypse.

[00:40:08] I'm sorry that random noises kept happening because Freddie was anyway.

[00:40:19] That's fine.

[00:40:20] It's reality of Freddie.

[00:40:21] I know when he when he first showed up,

[00:40:23] I was hoping he would hang out for a second.

[00:40:25] We could have him be one of the people in the community.

[00:40:28] I know one of the three people.

[00:40:32] At some point, I don't know if you caught this point.

[00:40:35] I want to get leaned into the mic and said my mom is getting me a snack.

[00:40:38] And something for me to eat.

[00:40:40] Oh, that was one of our younger listeners.

[00:40:43] He loves it.

[00:40:46] So I don't know if that's going to come up.

[00:40:49] Oh, that's cute.